Tuesday, June 22, 2010

Summer dreams ripped at the seams

I’m glad we’ve got the World Cup to distract us from the dullness of the SPL summer.

Given how bad some of last season’s football was I’m really quite depressed by the lack of activity. It seems to promise a whole heap of more of the same.

I know it’s still early. But, come on, throw us some kind of bone.

Yes, yes, I know. Celtic got Neil Lennon, Walter Smith stayed on and Rangers are no longer up for sale.

None of that was really exciting though. Lennon’s appointment was an open secret long before he was officially unveiled and its protracted nature ended up making it more boring than a fortnight at an activity centre run by Fabio Capello.

Likewise Smith’s new contract always seemed Rangers’ best option. And given that only a criminal and a jumped up estate agent seemed at all interested in buying the club the prospect of them being taken off the market was looking increasingly likely for weeks before it was announced.

Forgive me if I don’t start doing cartwheels at the news that Kevin Kyle will be bringing his human battering ram stage show to Tynecastle or that Hibs have signed Edwin de Graaf, a player who I almost saw once but didn’t.

St Mirren have installed a new manager and I applauded them for it. But that was because I rate Danny Lennon and like to see Scottish manager given a chance after working in the lower division. It’s certainly not because I’ve any great confidence that Lennon will bring more success to Paisley than Gus MacPherson did.

A suspicion confirmed by Lennon’s almost immediate swoop for David van Zanten, a capture that falls somewhere short of inspirational.

Motherwell at least showed some verve in getting the best named player so far in Angelis Charalambous from Anorthosis Famagusta. And Hamilton added that missing splash of showbiz at New Douglas Park when they signed her off Blue Peter’s brother, Gavin Skelton, from Kilmarnock.

My heart almost missed a beat when it looked like World Cup winning German Thomas Hassler might take the Kilmarnock job before he disappointed us all by recovering his sanity and asking how he had ended up on a tour of Rugby Park and could somebody kindly take him back to the airport please.

Even the Kris Boyd saga has gone quiet. Where will he go? Nobody knows. I thought I had the answer when I heard Kris had been spotted in Blackpool. It turns out he just takes a caravan down there every summer. It’s the candy floss and penny falls that he can’t get enough of.

Obviously it is hard to get things done with a World Cup on. Not because lots of players won’t start talking to new clubs until their national commitments are finished. No, it’s more that all our managers are sat in front of the TV sickening themselves with a diet of Pringles and Special Brew while ruminating on exciting new variations on 4-5-1.

So basically nowt is happening. Even the daily round-ups of all the SPL gossip are better saved and read at night when you need to drop off to sleep.

Maybe we should help them out by beginning our own rumours. Any suggestions?